About Me

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North Carolina, United States
(Allie & Harris) Wife, teacher, patient, thinker, friend, worrier, planner, seeker. These are the hats I wear on a daily basis for the roles in my life. Harris and I've been married since 1999 and we have two fur babies of the feline sort. We have a pretty good life, all things considered. But, it's not complete. Seven years ago I received a diagnosis of PCOS, a condition which has taken a toll on both my body and soul. It will not beat me though and we will be parents.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Surrogate Chosen!

Well, for better or for worse, we selected our surrogate earlier today, and will go to sign the paperwork tomorrow at 5:30.  It will be our first meeting with the lawyer who we'll also use at the end of the process for baby paperwork and all things legal.  Our doctor did ultrasounds and bloodwork on the surrogates most close to our cycle last night and sent us a possible 5 surrogate profiles this morning.  From those 5, there were 2 that she recommended we choose from.  We looked at all 5 and agreed that these were the 2 best ones in terms of age, fertility, and general characteristics.  We did request to NOT have a picture of the surrogate or to have a meeting with her as we want to keep this a business arrangement; we are not here to bond with her, just to use her in this business transaction.  In retrospect, I wish I had asked for initials instead of full names.  It may seem cold, but in order to keep our sanity and peace of mind, this has to remain business.  While we will forever be grateful to her if this works, we don't plan for her to become a phantom member of our family or someone we send Christmas cards to afterwards.  I know that's not the way a lot of people do it, but this is our path and it's what will work for us as a couple.

Tomorrow morning at 6 am we go to the hospital for our trigger shot (ovulation will be about 36 hours later).  Tomorrow at lunch we're going to meet a friend at a nice mall.  Then, we have the meeting with the attorney at the clinic at 5:30 tomorrow afternoon where we will sign the contracts.  Friday, we are at the apartment like normal until 11 am.  Then, I have to fast from 11 onward and I go to the hospital for prep at 3pm.  They will give me general anesthesia thru an IV in my hand or arm (wherever they can tap a vein) which will knock me out completely (thank God).  The plan is to do the retrieval around 4pm - it's a 20 minute process - and then have me out and in one of the recovery rooms afterward.  Harris will give a fresh semen sample on the day of retrieval for them to use once the eggs are obtained.  The embryologist will then get to work.  I'll go home Friday night with some pain meds plus antibiotic to prevent infection and Dr. Shivani said I would be a little sore on Saturday, but should be back to normal on Sunday.  I am glad that we're able to have 48 hours after the procedure just in case there's a problem.  

Monday morning, the surrogate goes in for the transfer and then we should hear something around the 30th about whether or not she is pregnant with our child.  Boy, that's a strange sentence to type/hear/say/think about. 

Our nurse celebrated with us this morning when we took the last fertility shot!


  1. Goodluck with the retrieval,fertilization and implantation. i bet you will feel a range of emotions afterwards. i did! i dont know how you do it but you are really strong! By the time i was getting to retrieval, i could not go out and about, i was so heavy and moody. I understand your thought about not wanting to meet your SM. we chose not to meet her too but i know that i will want to when our baby is born to say thank you. I pray you have success and will be looking out for your New Year blessing.

  2. Oh so close now!! I cannot wait for you to have your retrieval and get this show on the road. BABY DUST!!!

  3. Fingers crossed super-hard for good results!

  4. I'm so excited for you guys!! Hope the retrieval goes well....totally understand about the business arrangement part...it is much easier for me emotionally to go this route than to have a family member or close friend do this for us...everyone has to do what is right for them and for us, SCI is the way to go, hands down...loads of baby dust your way...try not to worry about the retrieval..i've had two and dr. shivani's was soooo much easier on me!!! It was like I had nothing done...the first one was pretty rough but I could have run a race after the 2nd one...anyway, good luck!!! Rene'

  5. Congrats! We plan on going to india in the beginning of 2013. Your blog is very detailed oriented and giving me tons of information. Being in the medical field myself and a huge type A planner, your blog has been wonderful! Good luck with everything and thank you for the great info. Kelly

  6. WOW! now it's really really close!. Completely understand how you need to keep it like a 'business transaction' we did too - I'm already emotionally invested and felt that it would feel too close.... and really send me over the edge!.
    As for the procedure - it was fantastic, the recovery was different to what I was expecting but I felt 100% within 1 hour of recovery.
    Will be thinking of you!!